Who put drugs in my drugs?!

I've been studiously avoiding talking about the seedier side of the Chris Pronger affair, in a shocking departure from my usual willingness to get down and dirty with the crassest of 'em.

Until now.

I just have to laugh, at this point. I mean, really--if this is true (and we'll never find out the real tr00f, no matter how many e-mails some random mediot at TSN sends out about it), can you just...

I'm just speechless about this, really. I mean, what can you say to something that is so surreal and comedy-of-errorsesque that it's just writing itself?

What's next, a blue dress with incriminating stains is going to surface?