14 March, 2006

Finally off Ye Olde Schneide.

The Hurricanes snapped their three-game losing streak in grand fashion this evening with a 5-3 smacking of the Rangers (who outshot them almost 2:1!)

Very nice game, with a few exceptions:

1) ATTN: Mike Commodore
Plz to not crosscheck guy in front of a ref, k and thx.

2) ATTN: Hurricanes
Plz to do better job trying to clear puck from zone, k and thx.

3) ATTN: Anton Babchuk
Two words, kiddo: Shooter Tutor.

I was so happy to see Doug Weight moved back to his natural position tonight (Center)--it's where he's most comfortable, and tonight it reaped huge dividends (2g, 2a, First Star) for him. I was also very impressed with Mark Recchi--he was hitting everything with a white jersey on, and had some very nice chances too.

And then there were the durnken asshats sitting behind me in 332 Row D, who were still being served beer even though they were clearly intoxicated, and who should (in my opinion) have been tossed by the RBC securebots (who were posted at each end of the section) when all of us in Row A plus all the people sitting around them complained to the ushers AND to security about them after second period--especially when they were both spotted heading back to their seats from yet another beer stand with a beer in each hand. The game would have been wicked enjoyable were it not for those two morons, who roont a lot of the night for me and everyone else with their drunken jackassery. Bad show by the RBC staff in not being a little more proactive in that matter.

Martini Glasses and Chalices

In my travels through the message boards of the Caniac Nation (est. 1997), I always find rather large knots of idiocy populated by people that piss and whine when the Hurricanes aren't in the running for the President's Trophy.

My question is always: Why?

Why care so much about the President's Trophy? It's not the Cup. Don't you people care about the Stanley Cup? Who cares if they win the President's Trophy? It means nothing at all if you get bounced in the playoffs--just ask the 1986 Oilers, the 2001 Blues, or the 2003 Senators. I would much rather the Hurricanes focus on themselves and what they're doing, and work on getting somewhere once the postseason arrives. Who cares about what happens out West? That will attend to itself, and there is nothing the Hurricanes or their fans can do to change it.

If the Hurricanes win the President's Trophy, so be it. If not, then who gives a damn? Are you people really so stupid and shallow that you'll be lighting yourselves on fire and flinging yourselves off the top of the RBC Center if the Hurricanes are second overall in the NHL come April?

Go stand over there in the corner with all the State fans that want Herb Sendek's head on a pike because the Wolfpack lost in the ACC Tournament and the Carolina fans that piss and whine when the Heels lose to Duke in the regular season--Gods only know you're about as smart as they are.

(I don't even believe I just used a college ball reference)

I want the Cup. Period. I don't give a damn about magazine covers, power rankings (though Scott Cullen is STILL a toolbag--and a patronizing one at that), newspaper coverage, a stupid-looking martini glass, or even Hairy freaking Gelrose.

I. Want. The. Cup. That is all I care about, and if you're too gods-damned stupid to figure out what's more important then I don't know what more to say.

12 March, 2006

Open Letter, v. WTFarepeoplethinking

ATTN: Jack Johnson, University of Michigan defenseman
FROM: The Acid Queen, Hockey blogger

SUBJ: Spring Fever

Greetings from your future NHL home! I see that you're having a great time in the NCAA playoffs for UMich, and that you're planning to stay another three years.

My advice:

Follow through with those plans.

Y'see, Jack, a few souls in the 'Canes fanbase are salivating at the idea of you joining the Hurricanes after the Wolverines' season is done. Some of these people are actively campaigning on message boards and in other locales (see comments) for you to be signed the instant you're done with the NCAA season, and to hell with how it may harm your development, whether or not you're actually ready for the NHL yet, or whether or not you actually want to sign with the 'Canes after you're done with this year at UMich.

Please stay at UMich, young man. I would much rather see you come to the Hurricanes after four years of careful development under the watchful eye of Red Berenson and actually be ready to go (not to mention having a college education), than see you be rushed and not be as great as people had hoped. The people that are screaming the loudest for you to be signed by the 'Canes are blind homers that just want to see you chucking flying elbows at random people in the playoffs, and frankly they aren't worth listening to in the first place. These are the same people that drive up to Martinsville or down to Charlotte or Talladega only to come home pissed off when there isn't a wreck, so really you're better off just ignoring them.

(Gods, I don't even believe I used a NASCAR reference)

Think of all the good things that college has to offer--an education, first and foremost among them. Stay in school and get that edjamacation before you hie off to the green fields of the NHL, and fuhgeddabout what a scattered handful of fools want. Do what's best for you so that when the time comes you can do what's best for the Hurricanes.


The Acid Queen